New collar (E)

My new locking rubber collar, with my ever-present Eternity Collar below

My Goddess and I received a new collar for me this week: a superb locking rubber collar, higher and firmer than my usual leather collars. Despite being more rigid and more severe than the leather collars I have worn on a daily basis, it is still surprisingly comfortable, if more restrictive.

My Goddess loved it right away. There is something ironic about how a more imposing collar creates an impression of even greater submission. Upon first seeing it, she admired its more "ornamental" appearance. I think she enjoyed that it did not only serve very functional and symbolic purposes, but it also had a beauty to it, somehow enhancing my submissiveness in how decorative it looked.

She is clearly also quite enamored with the delightful ringing sounds the four attached rings produce with my every movement. My Goddess has "a thing" for watching me, or hearing me, being submissive around the house. Dominant entertainment, I guess...

On my side, I am glad to wear a piece with such symbolism that brings my Goddess enjoyment. Inevitably, this increases even further her sense of dominance and control over me. The latter, of course, makes me feel ever more submissive and subservient to her. The ying-and-yang of ownership and belonging...


Image courtesy of Make Me Yours via Girls Rule, Subs Drool

Since I must always be wearing a locking collar at home, and on some outings when circumstances allow, I know that it will see a fair amount of use. The daily collaring is one of our favorite rituals, and now there is a new collar in the rotation. My Goddess has made me wear the new locking rubber collar ever since it has come in. I know it is not the end of the leather collars, however, since we both love and enjoy them so much.

The purpose of this piece was for me to have a collar that was easier to clean after a long day (or two... or three...) of domestic duties around the house. In fact, I could even take a shower with this thick rubber collar on without needing my Goddess to remove it. We both very much love my locking leather collars, but I always have misgivings about doing heavier work and breaking a sweat while wearing them. And cleaning leather collars can be a tedious process.

Now depending on plans for how I may best serve her, my Goddess can select the collar of her choice, and leave it on me, locked, for as long as she wants. Or until I need to go in to work...



Image courtesy of Under Feet via Girls Rule, Subs Drool

Owning the "s" in D/s: a pictorial essay (E)

Images courtesy of Dark Angel Dreams via Dishevelled Domina

During moments of reflections this week, I realized once more how important it was for me to be proactive in, and committed to, my submission to my Goddess if I was really to give her the opportunity to express and exercise her dominance over me. No matter how well a D/s relationship is going, no matter how strong the D/s dynamics are, sometimes life gets in the way. And it's easy to drift into a bit of indifference, or worse, to fall into the trap of wondering what our partners are doing wrong, and to forget about the part we own in the relationship. So I decided that it was as good a time as any to re-own more fully the "s" in our D/s relationship.

Image courtesy of Slave in Training via Girls Rule, Sub Drools

In my mind, that means a few things. To be more openly enthusiastic with my submission. To be more communicative with my needs. To be more expressive with my submission, my love, and my affection toward her. To let go of the outside world when we do get time together. Not only does it make no sense that my Goddess would react positively while I am pre-occupied intellectually and emotionally with other things, I know by experience that her level of enjoyment and fulfillment in our relationship and our activities is directly proportional to my reactions, my engagement, my enthusiasm, and the depth of my submission.

Image courtesy of Alternative Female Domination via GeekDomme

I know how my Goddess reacts to my offering of my submission. She loves to take control, to take advantage, and to seize any opportunity to dominate me in whatever manner she is in the mood for.

Image courtesy of Cruella via GeekDomme

Of course, all this is easier said than done. Being aware of these things is essential to success, but awareness is not sufficient. Only when thought is a precursor to action is success possible. If I do everything I can to set the mood, and fuel her hunger for dominance, she will be more than happy to take everything I have to offer. And then some. So it is up to me to step things up.

Image courtesy of Minha Mente Impura via GeekDomme

Before anybody starts worrying about us, don't. We are doing quite well. Busy but well. Our daily rituals keep the D/s dynamics flowing freely and easily, even during those times we wish we had the time and the energy to increase/elevate the frequency and intensity of our activities. After all, we are who and what we are.

Image courtesy of Slaves of the Goddess

Finally, lest it would seem that I have selfish motives here, it should be made clear that this is not all about me. This is about my contribution to my Goddess' happiness, her fulfillment, and the quality and intensity of our lives in our chosen lifestyle.

Image courtesy of Fine Erotica

Recap: It's been a while between posts (E)

Image courtesy of Femdom Resource, credited to Strawberry Mistress' Tumblr

As it is usually after the case after a long period of not posting, I am bursting with a smorgasbord of thoughts, visions, and emotions. So here goes...

I would have gone to do some errands this morning, but it wasn't really possible. My Goddess went to bed last night without unlocking the leash she attached to my locked leather collar earlier, keeping me confined (in the best possible way!) to our home, and close to her. Late yesterday afternoon, she had gone for a nap, and being both terribly tired and not feeling too well, she got up just for a short time during the evening, and went back to sleep for good.

It may help to understand that this particular leash is a 50' long, 3/16" thick steel cable that is attached to a brass structure of our bed. Typically, she'll attach it to my ever-present locked leather collar when she goes for a nap and she expects me to be doing some housework, which was the case yesterday.

Here are some posts about the original house leash, adventures in leashing, and about the leash and other rituals.


 - - - - -

Without a doubt, my favorite recent find on Twitter is a very cute and funny clip put up by Miss Ginger Millay:

Shit Girls Say to Dominatrices

Interestingly enough, while I was watching the clip with my Goddess, she told "she's just your style." Not quite sure what my Goddess meant by that, although I guess she was remarking on Miss Ginger's humor and fun enthusiasm.

 - - - - -

Hottest (in a D/s kind of way) conversation of the last month with my Goddess:

In a discussion about money matters last weekend, my Goddess brought a quick end to the back and forth of the talk by interjecting "Oh, that's right... I own you." Well, that did it. Case closed, she wins, and in my momentary pause, I get hit by a little wave of subspace.

 - - - - -

Hottest texts of the last month:

"You're getting tied up tonight!"

I'm still amazed, and delighted, that several years into our relationship, I still get butterflies in my stomach and get all subspacey when she tells me that. And of course, I usually spend the rest of the day suffering from a total loss of focus.

Spending time in bondage in the care of my Goddess, with or without other BDSM activities, always justifies the emotional ramp-up, and reinforces both our D/s dynamics and the lasting imagery/imprint of those moments.

 - - - - -

Back of the topic of leashes, dissatisfied with the cell phone tracking apps we had been using, we upgraded to a monthly service that allows my Goddess to track my every movement... at all times and with great accuracy. In addition, she can load up addresses and days/times of my week's work schedule. Notifications come in to her cell phone if I'm not where I'm supposed to be at those times.

It has been a source of great D/s enjoyment for her... upon her first notification (she hadn't reset the schedule and location when I was out of town at a trade show), she texted me "Oh, I'm going to enjoy this!"

On my side, I'm glad to provide my Goddess with that level of control (and pleasure). I had written a post a while back called The invisible leash in which I talked about the D/s dynamics of the decision to have her be able to track my location 24 hours a day.

It's kind of interesting that, contrary to the normal feelings that may arise in non-D/s relationships, having less freedom and submitting to more control is increasingly appealing to me as our D/s relationship grows over time.

 - - - - -

I so have to clean up our blog's links. It's been so long... a number of links are no longer valid, and I have so many more to add. Be that as it may, I'd like to point out that shortly after this post goes live, I'll add the following photo sites:
Geek Domme
Felm Cyber
Please keep you slave on a leach
Slave in Training

 - - - - -

And finally, an image that could be of me while my Goddess is busy taking a shower, or otherwise busy and needing me out of the way but behaving.

Image courtesy of zzzdragonbdsm via Strawberry Mistress' Tumblr

Playtime, blogs, and tweets (E)

Artwork courtesy of Written in the Water via Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress

After I shared my new post with Goddess Selena Saturday night, we both began exchanging some tweets with our friend Mistress Lilyana regarding a comment she tweeted about an article that my Goddess contributed for Geisha Diaries. We then spent some time together looking at some pictures from blogs, Twitter, Fetlife, and considering potential new kinky purchases (looks like a cupping set is in our future).

It was getting late, and we headed off to the bedroom to go to sleep. Or so I thought. It wasn't long that Goddess Selena was on top of me, bound my hands and attached them to the headboard of the bed, blindfolded me, pulled out the spreader bar, and locked my ankles into the cuffs at each end of it. And after she locked my ankles in the spreader bar, realised that I stil had my briefs on, so she took the scissors to them. Wow... In no time flat, I was restrained and captured, unable (and of course, unwilling) to escape whatever she had planned for me.

Whatever she did have planned for me included small (plastic) and large (plastic and wood) clothespins that she applied at her leisure over my penis and scrotum, and on my nipples. She took some time to enjoy a cigarette while she continued the sensation play with a Wartenberg wheel, running it over the tender flesh of my torso legs, and privates. She put aside the wheel just long enough to tease each of my nipples with the tip of her cigarette. After she was done smoking, she added a second wheel, making me squirm hard against my bondage.

Between runs of the Wartenberg wheels, she scratched and deeply etched my skin with her nails. The sensation play, the entirety of my universe while I was blindfolded and bound, was occasionally interrupted by my Goddess giving me some teasing kisses, which never lasted long enough for me to really kiss her back. I could feel how empowered she got enjoying my increasing desperation and frustration in not being able to kiss her back.

She removed the clothespins, and I was especially thankful for not having those small plastics clothespins searing certain areas of my scrotum anymore. I had a full body tremor with the removal of each one of those.

My Goddess took a short break as she went into the living room to retrieve a recent purchase, a small leather slapper with star indents. She had fun slapping the inside and outside of my thighs with it, and teasing me with very gentle taps against my testicles.


I could tell she so wanted to strike me with the slapper hard enough to leave little star marks on my skin. But the angle I presented bound on the bed, combined with the unwieldy nature of the bondage position (and equipment) I was in did not make that a possibility without interrupting the flow of the scene. I expect that this will only make for a higher level of intensity when she finally takes the slapper to my backside in the next day or so.

After the fairly heavy sensation play, and the light impact play, I was deep into subspace. I think my Goddess thought I had fallen asleep when she put away the slapper and began marking me with little symbols and words of dominance and love and ownership with one of the Sharpies.

She finished her artwork on my body, and after some caressing, she slowly removed my blindfold and looked into my eyes. I don't know what she was seeing on her side, but I was overwhelmed by the radiance of her beautiful face and dominant energy.

As she eased me out of my trance, we talked about what we had each most enjoyed about our playtime, talked about our evening's exploration of web kink, and talked about our day.

And then, before both of us fell asleep, my Goddess tweeted:

"@SelenasDymion is locked onto the spreader bar right now. I think it will remain overnight. Wouldnt want him wandering off, now would I?"

"You will submit" by IshaNee

More about feet (E)

Image: a recent purchase by Goddess Selena

I thought the best way to follow-up my last post would be to... talk some more about feet. My Goddess' gorgeous feet in particular.

In addition to the on-my-knees foot kissing welcome my Goddess requires every time I get back to her after any kind of absence (coming back from work or from an errand), or first thing in the morning, she has also expected me to paint her toe nails on the weekend, every second week or so. While that has involved a bit of a learning curve, with lots of improvement yet to come, I think my technique has been steadily getting better.

Image: "Silver Dazzle" on Goddess Selena's toe nails

I must admit, I've been enjoying this latest additional duty. Of course, I enjoy everything that involves taking care of my Goddess. But beyond that, there is something very erotically submissive about being at her feet, sitting on the floor, and attending to her. And making her feel beautiful. Another small duty that reinforces our D/s dynamics.

My Goddess exercising her dominance over me... rituals reinforcing the nature of our D/s relationship... submitting to the needs and desires of my Goddess... definitely good times. Hot, fun, symbolically powerful, and often bringing about a small dose of subspace for me, this recent emphasis on foot play has been a wonderful addition in our lives.

Image courtesy of Slaves of the Goddess

You never know when something new... (E)

B. Polaczek via he stoops to worship

... will come along.

A few weeks ago, my Goddess decided that I should kneel before her and kiss her feet whenever I get back to her after we've been apart for a while.

So since her decree, I've gotten on my knees before her and kissed her feet with much reverence any time I come back from work, return from an errand, or see her awake for the first time in the morning.

In retrospect, for a couple whose D/s relational dynamics already include a number of daily rituals, it may be surprising that this simple and straightforward recent addition was only introduced several years into our relationship. And yet, I see it as a very positive thing, beyond the enjoyment my Goddess gets from it, above the thrill I feel doing it, and on level with the very powerful symbolism of the gesture.

Found on i'm Her husband and She is in charge

As modest of a physical action as it may seem to some, especially as it relates to some of our other activities, I see it as an encouraging sign that we're still growing, still exploring, still open to looking for things (large or small) that may appeal to us, and still willing to make changes. OK, so we're still relatively early and young into our relationship... a few years are not a few decades. And yet, we all know that it's all too easy to get into deep ruts in a matter of months.

My Goddess felt so strongly about this, and we have very enthusiastically embraced this 2-3 times a day ritual. For something that so powerfully reinforces our D/s dynamics, it's kind of surprising that we lived without it for so long. That being said, extended foot kissing has always been one of our favorite activities, and comes up several times a week.

You never know what you'll come across if you just keep exploring. And with minds wide open, a relationship never needs to grow old.

Image courtesy of Let the Sin Begin

What I'm wearing right now (E)

My Goddess texted me mid-afternoon yesterday that she was "in a mood." That usually means that she's feeling especially possessive and dominant. It's a not-so-subtle signal that I should be coming back home properly submissive and ready to do her bidding. She also knows that from the time she lets me know that she's "in a mood", my sense of anticipation grows exponentially until I find out what she has in mind.

We both came back home quite late, and after a short chat to catch up on our respective days at work, we headed to the bedroom ready to call it a day. My Goddess was quick to grab the metal handcuffs off her bedside table, and lock them around my wrists. Perhaps echos of Tuesday evening's overnight bondage. And at that moment, I found out what she had in mind: "Tattoos & Bondage!"

Once I was handcuffed, my Goddess made me lie on my stomach, and attached the cuffs to the headboard of the bed. She then sat on my lower back, and went to work. She took two Sharpies, and spent the next 10-15 minutes visually expressing herself. It was not a tattoo, obviously, but the content was just as heartfelt and powerfully evocative in the emotions it brought up. Dominant and possessive indeed!

After seeing what it looked like in the morning, I remembered vaguely a post I had written quite a while ago, Reminders of so many things:

"The symbolism of the markings goes far beyond the simple gestures and play of putting them on. Both my Goddess and I will be seeing them for days to come, and reminded of this little scene. Reminded of the significance of the markings. Reminded of the nature of our relationship. Reminded of our love for each other."

And those words are as true today as they were almost two years. So for the past 24 hours, I've been wearing my Goddess' markings with much pride, satisfaction, and a lasting feeling of subspace. And I know these deep feelings will remain with me over the course of the next few days, until the last vestiges of last night's expression of my Goddess' dominance and possessiveness finally wash off.

Kitara's Prize, by Chaypeta, via Lunar Black