"... when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."
-- When Harry met Sally

"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances; if there is any reaction, both are transformed."
-- Carl Jung

Sunday, September 18, 2011

She wants me home when she wakes up (E)

Image courtesy of FLR - The Future of Relationship via Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress

So... I had a few errands to run this morning. Since I always wake up quite a bit earlier than my Goddess, the idea was that I would be out of the house and back before she got up. Wearing the locked leather collar would not be an issue this early in the morning in this wet and cold weather.

Two things changed the plans. The first are the bound hands. Last night, before going to sleep, my Goddess asked for some rope, and bound my wrists with a simple 7-coil column tie for the night. The tie was constraining and inescapable, with just enough room to allow for some movement during sleep and to never cut off circulation. Once my wrists were tied, she ordered me into one of her favorite sleeping positions. I was to be on my side facing her, and place my thighs under her knees as she lay on her back. Then, she grabbed the area of rope between my wrists, pulled it over to her chest, and gently fell asleep.

The previous evening, I was placed in a very similar situation but with metal handcuffs instead of rope. Much earlier in the evening, right after dinner, my Goddess had asked for the handcuffs so that I would be bound during our TV watching. She also took the opportunity to use me as furniture. I sat in the corner of the sofa, she lay back against me, and she had me loop my arms around her, so that I had no choice but to hold her and hug her throughout our time watching television. For as long as she wanted. The only interruptions came when she wanted to smoke, at which point I moved to the floor at her feet and held the ashtray. And my Goddess left the handcuffs on for the night's sleep.

This morning, she woke up briefly as I was going to get out of bed. I thought that she would remove the rope keeping my wrists bound, but she told me that we would catch up on errands later. She wanted me here, at home, when she woke up. With that, she fell back to sleep, and I quietly walked away from the bedroom.

So here I am at home, prisoner of my Goddess' love and dominance. My long house leash is attached to my locked leather collar (so that she can tug and pull me in if she needs anything), with my ever-present Eternity Collar below/under, my wrists are tied in a beautiful column tie, and I am catching up to our blog... slowly. The tightness of the column tie only allows me to type with one hand. You probably have no idea how challenging it is to select text for cut-and-paste into Word for final spell-checking (I find Blogger's annoying), or for hyperlinking with just one hand, unless you've been placed in that predicament. Just opening the laptop was a bit of a challenge (fingers only on one side until I could open the laptop far enough to wedge my left elbow to leverage the top and bottom open.)

I will try to do more productive things around the house, but the range of things I can do is rather limited. Even taking down my underwear and pulling them back on after using the toilet is a mini-ordeal. Try pulling up the back of your underwear with only 1-1.25" between your wrists. Hand-washing dishes is impossible.

I went to wake up my Goddess at her appointed cut-off time, but she decided to sleep-in a little longer, so I ended up another hour in partial bondage. It gave me time to nearly finish this post.

Once my Goddess did get up for our morning ritual, I let her know that I would be unable to present her with her coffee with the nipple clamps (as is the routine) while my wrists were still bound. She looked at me with a wonderfully dominant grin, and decided that was alright. "I'm enjoying my rope" she told me playfully.

I love being in bondage for my Goddess' enjoyment. I love being in her control. I love being her play toy. Of course, part of it is about how it fulfills my need for submission, for my submission to her, for her attention, for my Goddess to express and display her dominance toward me. But even more, I love to make her smile. I love to make her feel that I belong to her. I love to make her feel sexy. I love to give her the opportunity to express and display her dominance. I love to make her feel that I am totally devoted to her. I love to make her feel that I would do anything for her, and do it with all my heart. And this is why we so enjoy anything we do together.

Image courtesy of Femdom Proper via Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress

PS: If you try the overnight wrist bondage with a column tie, make sure there is sufficient room once you secure the knot in order make sure that it will not cut-off circulation even as the arm positions change during sleep. More coils gives you more flexibility while keeping the tie secure. And if you try going overnight with handcuffs, make sure they have a locking mechanism, otherwise pressure on them may inadvertendly click them too tight, which may affect circulation. Play hard but play safe...

Friday, September 9, 2011

The secret is... enthusiasm (E)

A Little Light Bondage by Sorceress2000, via Lunar Black

Enthusiasm expresses wants and needs, and wants and needs impose will. Enthusiasm is the collection of many little daily gestures and words that expresses my Goddess' dominance, and her enjoyment of our D/s relational dynamics. And the fun she has playing with her toy... me.

Enthusiasm is my Goddess...

...giving me a harsh look and barking "Where's your collar, Bitch!" if I take any undue time to offer her the locking collar upon my arrival home each day. It happens very seldom... but when it does...

...pointing at her feet, where she wants me to sit, when she is ready to smoke and wants me to hold the ashtray for her;

...telling me what she wants or what she needs, and it is absolutely clear in the tone of her voice, that she is expecting, without a shadow of a doubt, that I will do it for her or get it for her;

...taking hold of my hair or my collar, pulling me in close to her, exhaling her cigarette smoke in my mouth;

...suddenly grabbing me by the hair while I'm sitting at her feet on the floor, and walking me over to the other end of the living room, leaving me on all fours, and serving up 24 strokes with the paddle, followed by 24 strokes with the cane;

...deciding that I will serve as furniture, and putting her legs up on my shoulders when I am at her feet on the floor, or telling me I must sleep at a 90 degree angle to her so that she can lay her legs up over my torso to sleep more comfortably, or ordering me to sit behind her so she can recline against me while we watch TV;

...bursting out "I really want to hurt you!" during lovemaking, and she brings me to a thunderous orgasm as I simultaneously whimper from the nipple torture;

...finalizing plans to bring me out to have a tattoo identifying me as her property;

...telling me "You're getting tied up tonight!" and after binding my wrists to the headboard of the bed, leaving me bound until the time the morning alarm goes off;

...sitting on my stomach while I am bound, and marking my chest with dominantly possessive drawings and notes with different colored Sharpies, which will remain visible for 3-5 days.

Enthusiasm is... the secret to the magic of D/s. At least for us it is.

Iconic picture of Prodomme Mistress Juliet Taylor (who seems to have retired), found on Women with Whips

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Resources update (E)

Image courtesy of Fine Erotica

Just took a little time over the weekend to do a much-needed update of the resources on this blog.

We're quite proud of the resources on this blog. And you, the readers, have given us many compliments about the art we choose for our blog entries, something we take to heart. The links to blogs, photography sites, specialty sites, and commercial sites are meant to provide inspiration and understanding, bring to light a range of fetishes and lifestyle choices, share some beautiful BDSM artwork, and list educational resources. And yeah... I guess some of it may be good wanking material.


It is by no means a comprehensive list. There are a number of fetishes and lifestyle choices that are not represented here, primarily because we're not into them... no disrespect intended to those that are. Even among those things we are interested in, or participate in, it would be foolish to even think that, in these times of exponential growth of the internet, it would be possible to document them all.

So as we come across material that we enjoy and/or appreciate, just like taking pictures of things that catch our eye on a road trip, we try to make note of what we like, put it somewhere we'll remember, and share with those that may have a similar interest.

This weekend's clean-up was about deleting sites that had been closed, sites that had become inactive and had lost their interest for us, and adding some new sites. The pictures that book-end this entry are from some of our recently added links. If you catch any link that is not active anymore on our blog, we'd like for you to let us know. The number of links listed has become a little unwieldy, and very large for us to manage, and we may not always notice in a timely manner.

We know that not all of you have websites or blogs, and among those of you that do, not all of you keep a list of resources related to femdom relationships, femdom play, and femdom activities. If you come across anything of note and you won't list it yourself, please feel free to leave us a comment listing the link, or send us an email. We won't guarantee that we'll list it if we feel it is an awkward fit for us, but we'll certainly consider it. We especially want to hear from you if you have a blog or website of (femdom) interest, and you'd like us to list you. We love highlighting things, new and old, that may be of interest to our readers.

In the meantime, we hope you keep enjoying our blog, and its resources, and if you have any feedback, or thoughts you want to share with us, go ahead and drop-in for a while.



Image courtesy of I am Mistress Becca

Saturday, September 3, 2011

New collar (E)

Image courtesy of The Sum of Me

I still recall vividly the day I was collared by my Goddess. It was a very special moment that I remember with much pride, warmth, and humbleness. A few short weeks after that turning point in our lives, it was determined that I would always wear a locked leather collar when I was with her in the house.

Several years later, the meaning of our very private collaring ceremony, and later, of our daily collaring, so that I am collared in her presence at all times (when away from the public), is as significant and meaningful as it has ever been. My commitment to my Goddess, her well-being, her happiness, and her fulfillment, remains unwavering. The sense of warmth, of purpose, and of belonging I feel being my Goddess' collared submissive/toy/pet is as powerful and intense as ever.

Our locking leather collar was a classic design. It was all black leather. Made from a one-piece strap, it was 1.25" wide, had 3 D-rings, and it had a locking buckle. The collar was elegantly classic (in a BDSM kind of way), firm, ungiving, strong yet flexible... all qualities shared by the person to whom it was a tribute to... my Goddess.

But it had to be retired recently after well over two years. Wear and increasing difficulties in cleaning it thoroughly led us to the decision to find another locking leather collar.

The collar had a good life, saw much use, and was an important part of our lives. There were short evenings and nights when I wore it only five or six hours. There were also long weekends when I wore it over 80 hours out of a possible 84 hours or so. It was always on when we were home together, and often it was worn for fetish events. Occasionally it was worn for quick errands (alone) or discreet outings (with my Goddess) on cold weather days.

On days when both my Goddess and I were at home, the collar often had a leashed attached to it. There were many, many moments when my Goddess grabbed the middle D-ring to pull me close to her and said to me in no uncertain way "Mine!"

There were times when my Goddess fell asleep next to me holding on to the middle D-ring. There were other times when she clipped my cuffed wrists to the side D-rings in order to get my hands and arms out of the way as she tortured my nipples with her lit cigarette, used several small and large clothespins for some CBT, dropped hot wax all over my chest, applied temporary tattoos, wrote notes of dominant and possessive love over my chest and back, or decided to do some facesitting.

So often I ran my fingers over the locking buckle and lock, feeling how secure they were, playing with them, tugging on them, and reveling in my Goddess' control.

Now, we have a new collar. Black and purple (the latter being my Goddess' favorite color), it is made from two straps. The top, wider (1.25") strap is black, and the bottom, narrower strap (1.00") is dark purple. It has a fixed central D-ring, and two more floating D-rings. It has purple stitching. And of course, it has a locking buckle. It is made from softer leather, but the two straps composing it and the finished lining make it a bit heavier. It isn't quite as firm as the previous one, but just as ungiving.

We both really like it, and it certainly feels like a worthy replacement. And it will certainly be interesting to see what new collection of moments will come to be during the course of the next few years with this new collar.

Image courtesy of Slaves of the Goddess