Subspace awakening (E)

Image courtesy of Girls Rule, Subs Drool via Femdom Resource

I wake up this morning in a delightful subspacey daze. I spent the night serving as sleeping furniture for Goddess Selena, after our first “together” day in a while. What is a “together” day for us? No work, no obligations, “Coffee & Clamps!” in the morning, time at home where Goddess Selena keeps me collared and leashed and often at her feet when I’ll not on domestic duties, a late lunch date followed by some whimsical shopping and a movie, generally me doing things for her, and in between talking and laughing about everything in the world.

My subspacey awakening is intensified by the erotically D/s sensations and symbolism of the heavy leather collar locked around my neck, and the prospect of another, if different, “together” day. In those few seconds or minutes it takes to transition into consciousness and alertness, my emotional make-up of the moment brings about a torrent of flashbacks to the last time Goddess Selena let the phoenix of her dominance rise and consume both of us.

Image courtesy of Musings of a Mistress via Mistress Lilyana

After locking leather wrist and ankle cuffs on me, Goddess Selena strapped a blindfold around my head and ordered me on all fours on the bed. She quickly followed up with a long and increasingly stern caning that, about halfway through, had me break into a very light sweat, the unmistakable sign that I had crossed from the real world into subspace. I plunged further into the depths of subspace as she continued with another 30, perhaps 40 strokes from the two canes she was switching between every few dozen strokes. Satisfied with where she had taken me, Goddess Selena admired the colors and patterns of the marks she had etched on me, and ran her hands over my back to feel my quick, shallow breathing, the warmth and humidity of my skin, and the deep quiet moans coming from inside me.

Enjoying what she saw and felt, Goddess Selena wasted no time making changes to my bondage, and before I fully noticed the transition, I was restrained spread-eagle on our bed. Still blindfolded, her verbal teasing and humiliation made me focus on her voice as if I was looking at the sun from deep in a mine shaft. My attention shifted from the song of her dominant siren voice to the intoxicating aroma I rapidly recognized when she placed the panties she had been wearing that day over my nose. I took deep breaths, indulging in the powerful and sweet smell of Goddess Selena’s essence. I drifted ever deeper into subspace as Goddess Selena’s voice, her smell, and the sensations she felt like subjecting me to overwhelmed me.

Source: cdn-nl1.imagefap.com 

Images from the rest of our intimate D/s play time flash randomly, without order or sequence. Her nails digging into my nipples. Her lips touching mine so that she can exhale the drag she took from her cigarette. Her nails dragging and catching along the shaft of my semi-erect penis and the soft skin of my scrotum. Her orders to open my mouth when she needs to ash her cigarette. The tip of her lit cigarette brushing against my nipples. Her sitting on my hips, torturing my nipples, and riding my arched body until she reached orgasm. My back curving up as I react to the various exquisite sensations of pains she creates. My wrists and ankles straining against the locked leather cuffs and straps keeping me bound to the bed. The day-old panties still mostly over my nose. The images go back-and-forth as my emotional memories try to keep up.

I am back into the now. Now this morning. Locked heavy leather collar. Leash. Coffee and nipple clamps. Holding an ashtray while at her feet. Lots of affection and kisses. Catching up on house duties. Preparing for the week ahead.

Moments of our lives that slow down time as the memories bubble back to the surface of conscious thought…

Pull, by razriel. From Deviant Art. Found on Geek Domme and Mistress Lilyana.

Absence makes the dominant heart grow hungrier - part one (E)

Picture courtesy of Justin Thai, found originally on Stylish Femdom

It has been a very long time since the last post.  No, no… don’t be concerned.  Life sometimes gets in the way of blogging.  My apologies for the absence.  I will try my best to catch-up over the next week or so as I’ve had an irresistible urge in the past few weeks to return to the blog to share thoughts and highlights of our humble and kinky lives.  And I know you’ve missed us…  J

Several weeks ago, after a 6-day absence from home, Goddess Selena returned with an intense need to express her dominance.  She had been home for barely a few hours before I was bound, blindfolded, on all-fours on our bed, and she was standing next to me with her two favorite canes, a traditional thin switch and a hard lexan purple cane.  She teased me, hurt me, and then totally owned me with what must have been 50 or 60 strokes.  I felt the tell-tale signs of deep subspace mid-way through as I relaxed against the bondage, and the skin on my back broke into a light sweat of surrender.

While my backside was still hot and tingly, and my mind engulfed in her power, Goddess Selena had me lie down on the bed and marked me as “Selena’s Bitch 4ever” with a Sharpie pen.  I could feel her beaming in dominant satisfaction through every inch of my body.

She followed up by taking out our largest insert able, and assaulted me anally in an irresistibly erotic and dominant way.  I was awash in wave after deeper wave of subspace, and at each higher level of sensations and surrender she brought me to a moment of nexus where I didn’t know if I could handle any more yet I didn’t want her to stop. Goddess Selena took her time to slowly run through virtually all of the vibrator’s settings before she felt the need to move on.

Without pause, Goddess Selena proceeded to remove just enough ties to allow us to make love with an intensity, if not a savagery, that I had not felt in a long time.  From the violence of our thrusting against each other to the intense nipple torture she loves to submit me to during our lovemaking, it was absolutely overwhelming on all levels.  Several minutes after we had ended, my mind was still moving and dizzy, like the sensation one gets stopping suddenly after turning around and around and around.

We went to sleep shortly thereafter, and Goddess Selena left me in bondage overnight.

Artwork courtesy of The Heart's Dark Desires

"You don't make the rules..." (E)

Picture found on Femdom Resource

During some playful banter last night, Goddess Selena responded to a teasing remark from me by snapping back, “You don’t make the rules in this house!”

The mood that immediately ensued reminded me that I had wanted to find some time since last weekend for a post about how, in the days leading to then, my Goddess was on a noticeably more dominant streak. This translated into her being more teasing, more demanding, and expressing strict expectations of upcoming tasks. This time period also included an active return on Twitter, where she shared some of what was going on through her series of “It’s good 2B the Goddess…” tweets.

Image courtesy of Miss and pet (Tumblr account no longer active)

Our physical interactions were more intense as well. Goddess Selena took particular joy in us having the opportunity to have “Coffee & Clamps!” on three mornings (in four days), leaving my nipples little time to recover in between each session. Over the weekend, she unabashedly jumped on me after binding my wrists to the headboard of the bed. Without regards to my already exceedingly sensitive and sore nipples, she proceeded to bite, scratch, pinch, and torture them with a savage sensuality that I had not felt radiate from her in quite some time. The flow of energy between her dominance and the combination of my excitement and deepening surrender went back-and-forth, and grew with each exchange. The more I moaned and squirmed, the more she wanted to hurt me. The crescendo grew more powerful and louder over several minutes, and she refused to ease off until I reached a massive climax.

Image courtesy of Ms. Savannah Sly's Tumblr, found on Femdom Resource

Following long moments of closeness (while I’m trying to avoid any pressure against my chest) to wind down the incredible pitch of intensity from the previous few minutes, we fell asleep in each other’s arms. It was a deep, happy sleep that only comes from such moments of pushing ourselves physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Playtime, blogs, and tweets (E)

Artwork courtesy of Written in the Water via Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress

After I shared my new post with Goddess Selena Saturday night, we both began exchanging some tweets with our friend Mistress Lilyana regarding a comment she tweeted about an article that my Goddess contributed for Geisha Diaries. We then spent some time together looking at some pictures from blogs, Twitter, Fetlife, and considering potential new kinky purchases (looks like a cupping set is in our future).

It was getting late, and we headed off to the bedroom to go to sleep. Or so I thought. It wasn't long that Goddess Selena was on top of me, bound my hands and attached them to the headboard of the bed, blindfolded me, pulled out the spreader bar, and locked my ankles into the cuffs at each end of it. And after she locked my ankles in the spreader bar, realised that I stil had my briefs on, so she took the scissors to them. Wow... In no time flat, I was restrained and captured, unable (and of course, unwilling) to escape whatever she had planned for me.

Whatever she did have planned for me included small (plastic) and large (plastic and wood) clothespins that she applied at her leisure over my penis and scrotum, and on my nipples. She took some time to enjoy a cigarette while she continued the sensation play with a Wartenberg wheel, running it over the tender flesh of my torso legs, and privates. She put aside the wheel just long enough to tease each of my nipples with the tip of her cigarette. After she was done smoking, she added a second wheel, making me squirm hard against my bondage.

Between runs of the Wartenberg wheels, she scratched and deeply etched my skin with her nails. The sensation play, the entirety of my universe while I was blindfolded and bound, was occasionally interrupted by my Goddess giving me some teasing kisses, which never lasted long enough for me to really kiss her back. I could feel how empowered she got enjoying my increasing desperation and frustration in not being able to kiss her back.

She removed the clothespins, and I was especially thankful for not having those small plastics clothespins searing certain areas of my scrotum anymore. I had a full body tremor with the removal of each one of those.

My Goddess took a short break as she went into the living room to retrieve a recent purchase, a small leather slapper with star indents. She had fun slapping the inside and outside of my thighs with it, and teasing me with very gentle taps against my testicles.


I could tell she so wanted to strike me with the slapper hard enough to leave little star marks on my skin. But the angle I presented bound on the bed, combined with the unwieldy nature of the bondage position (and equipment) I was in did not make that a possibility without interrupting the flow of the scene. I expect that this will only make for a higher level of intensity when she finally takes the slapper to my backside in the next day or so.

After the fairly heavy sensation play, and the light impact play, I was deep into subspace. I think my Goddess thought I had fallen asleep when she put away the slapper and began marking me with little symbols and words of dominance and love and ownership with one of the Sharpies.

She finished her artwork on my body, and after some caressing, she slowly removed my blindfold and looked into my eyes. I don't know what she was seeing on her side, but I was overwhelmed by the radiance of her beautiful face and dominant energy.

As she eased me out of my trance, we talked about what we had each most enjoyed about our playtime, talked about our evening's exploration of web kink, and talked about our day.

And then, before both of us fell asleep, my Goddess tweeted:

"@SelenasDymion is locked onto the spreader bar right now. I think it will remain overnight. Wouldnt want him wandering off, now would I?"

"You will submit" by IshaNee

Playtime emotions and femdom imagery (E)

Image courtesy of Written in the Water via Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress

In the plethora of images in print and on the web related to BDSM in general, and female domination in particular, most are action-shots depicting an activity, a fetish, or perhaps a moment from a scene. While many are hot and enticing, most of them leave me somewhat unsatisfied. They feel not quite complete. In part, I think it's because they capture a certain physicality of what is depicted, but little else. Of course, I may be asking for too much from a single image.

However, occasionally, there are pictures that capture much more than a physical moment... they capture an emotional one. And that makes them rich and powerful, and they open the floodgates to remembrances of emotions lived before. The image that opens this post is one of them.

It brought back a flood of memories and emotions from some playtime my Goddess and I had a few weeks back, which I refer to in my last post, the product review on the Blue Spiral glass dildo. We had gone out a date where she looked absolutely stunning in a pin-stripe jacket over a nice white top, sexy dark grey tights, and her hot black high-heel boots. We had a wonderful dinner at a local Mexican restaurant, and when we returned home, it was clear she was feeling dominantly feisty.

Upon our return, after the daily placement and locking of my leather collar, my Goddess told me to fetch the leather wrist and ankle cuffs. She had them strapped and locked on my limbs in record time. Then she told me to pull out a leather blindfold, and to wait for her in bed, naked, on my stomach. My rapidly rising anticipation could barely keep up with the speed at which things were unfurling.

Once my Goddess walked into the bedroom, she quickly slipped and buckled the blindfold over my head, attached the wrist cuffs to the headboard of the bed and the ankle cuffs, about 30" apart, to the footboard of the bed. She sat on my lower back, reached under my chest, and began to torment my nipples with her fingers and her nails. Already sinking into subspace rapidly, I dropped even faster as I lay there bound and helpless, the pain from my Goddess teasing my nipples focused and amplified by the absence of distraction without sight. Her weight pressing down on me added even further to limiting my movements and my sense of helplessness.

Abruptly, she got off me, and walked away from the bed. The echoes of the sensations of the NT and her sitting on me,the feeling of her head and hair over my shoulder, eased the transition to the stark isolation of being alone and bound in the bedroom somewhat suddenly.

But it wasn't long before my Goddess returned. As I felt her to the side of the bed, a cold sensation came up my spine, over my shoulder, up my neck, and to my lips. Deep into subspace, I couldn't focus on what it was that she was teasing me with until she gently forced it beyond my lips and barely into my mouth. I then recognized the shape of the glass dildo that had been on her bedside table for many weeks, waiting to be used when the time and the mood was just right.

She pulled it out of my mouth, circling my lips again with it. I felt my Goddess standing next to me for a short while before she sat on the bed. A few seconds later, her fingers gently began lubricating a path for the Blue Spiral glass dildo down below. It wasn't long before I felt the pressure of the dildo against my anal opening, and I tried to relax best I could. Through little turning and in-and-out movements, my Goddess teasingly and skillfully worked the dildo inside me. In brief moments of focus as I kept feeling waves of subspace and deep intimacy wash over me, I could feel and hear her playful enjoyment to my reactions, to my movements, to my sounds.

Surprisingly quickly, the glass dildo was all the way in, and then she delighted in pulling it out a bit and pushing it back in to the hilt, and turning it inside me with the small knob/handle that is one of the characteristics of the Blue Spiral. Her movements took more amplitude and my reactions grew greater, and the latter grew even more as my Goddess' enthusiasm inspired her into more forceful movements.

She diminished of the intensity of the anal play over a few minutes, and then she stopped all together. Once more, rather abruptly, she got off the bed, told me not to lose the dildo, and walked away from me. I suddenly got worried through the fog of subspace that the glass dildo would slip out, but to my great surprise, it did not. In retrospect, the head of the dildo being quite a bit larger than the shaft, the dildo stayed in without any effort on my part.

I was taken out of subspace reverie by the smoke blown into my face by my Goddess. I had not heard her come back. Either she lit her cigarette in the next room, or I was so out of it that I didn't hear the lighter. Either way, she placed the cold metal ashtray on my back, sat on the bed next to my bound body, and enjoyed her cigarette, running her nails along my back, and occasionally, blowing more smoke in my direction. Every few drags, she would grab my hair, pull my head back and to the side, and exhale inside my mouth. When she does so, I know she expects me to take in all of her smoke, and I did my best not to let any escape until it was my turn to exhale. Twice during her smoke break, she brought the cigarette to my lips, forcing me to take a drag.

Barely a few seconds after my Goddess put out her cigarette in the ashtray on my back, I feel a sharp, hot impact on my lower back. It was the unmistakable impact of wax, heavy, hot, almost reverberating. By the smell, I could tell exactly which of the candles she was using too. This was one of those fragrant candles that we used to make the entire house smell nice. I think it was the cucumber-melon one. This would explain the intense heat of the drops that she was pouring across my back. The fragrance candles tend to have a higher oil content, and unless dropped from way high, they hit the skin much hotter. My Goddess regaled herself with the range of reactions I had to the drops, from deep moans in less sensitive areas like the back of my shoulders, to sharp inhales and exhales in more sensitive areas in fleshier parts like behind the kidneys.

One drop came down after another, sometimes in quick succession, sometimes with a few seconds in between. Sometimes she dropped them in a linear pattern, sometimes she dropped them in a seemingly random way. In between and during, my Goddess kept returning to teasing me and tormenting me with thrusts and turns of the dildo. If I would not have been so deeply lost in subspace, it might have all been overwhelming.

At one point, it all came to a gentle end. The hot wax stopped dripping. The glass dildo was gently removed. My Goddess ran her hands over my back, making something of a mess from the very soft wax. Oil-based scented candles tend to leave very soft, if not quite liquid, wax residue (easier but messier to remove.) And then, she tenderly caressed my hair and came in close to give me a long hug as part of the usual aftercare.

It is this very time that came back to me when I saw the picture opening this post. It spoke to me of a very special moment, full of intimacy and satisfaction. It felt like recovery from intense emotions and sensations. Of course, it has none of the toys or gear, or mess, from our playtime. But the look on the woman's face is just what I would have expected to see on my Goddess' face if I could have looked at her. And his body posture is just what I imagine mine would look like slowly coming out of subspace.

My mind wandering to that evening, I was reminded vividly of the intimacy of anal play with my Goddess. Of the energy she emanates when she expresses her dominance is such a physical way. Of how magical it is to feel her enjoyment during our playtime.

Image courtesy of Hello High Heels via Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress

Coffee and clamps! (E)

"Lordess of Rusty Spoons" via Lunar Black

Friday evening a week ago I asked my Goddess, "So... what are the plans for tomorrow?" Just one of those the-week-is-over-I-can't-wait-to spend-more-time-with-you moments.

She immediately exclaimed, "Coffee and clamps!" And she did so with the playfully evil, dominant smile that melts my heart and makes me weak in the knees.

Of course, our day-off morning ritual is a sacred part of our D/s relationship. I shared some of the basics at first in Morning Routine: The Daily 10, and provided some updates in Pushing Our Morning Ritual, in addition to occasionally providing references to our morning ritual in other posts.

I must admit, I found it heartwarming for my Goddess to remind me with so much enthusiasm how much she enjoys our D/s based interactions, play, and rituals, and how important they are to her. Of course, it was also tantalizingly subspacey for me to anticipate what was to come. I had a torrent of flashbacks running right then through my mind of key moments of the ritual... preparing her coffee, bringing it to her, and offering her the leash attached to my locked leather collar... sitting at her feet while she enjoys her coffee and a cigarette... holding the ashtray while she smokes... waiting for her to tell me "Coffee, Bitch!" when it comes time for a refill... and during all this time, wearing the nipple clamps she expects to see from the moment I present her with the very first cup of coffee, and keeping them on during the entire time of our morning ritual.

In fact, the clover clamps will remain until my Goddess finishes her third cup of coffee (she SO loves her coffee!) If she's feeling especially evil, and in the mood for a little more coffee (by now, the switch to decaf has already happened), she may even have a fourth cup before she removes the nipple clamps. Well before the third cup, the dull ache from the clamps has become a sharp pain that stabs my nipples with every movement I make.

The reality of the morning that followed was everything I anticipated, and more. Sometimes, predictibility is not a bad thing at all... It gets the butterflies going in your stomach, it gets a little wave of subspace washing over you, and it keeps your mind racing for hours and hours.

Oh... I almost forgot. And then, when it came time to remove the nipple clamps, my Goddess twisted them, pulled on them, pushed them to the sides, and only after tormenting my nipples like this for an extra minute or two did she finally remove them. But she wasn't done yet. She then used her fingers and nails to do even more NT, and continued until I could no longer hold back a whimper from the delicious pain she inflicted upon me. This is also an essential part of our morning ritual. It makes her happy. Especially the whimper.

We are both off from work today. My Goddess is still spleeping at the moment, but I can't wait for her to wake up and tell me, "Coffee, Bitch!" so that we can do this all over again.


Image courtesy of Pantyhose Supremacy via Lunar Black

In captivity... highlights of game night (E)

"Male Slave Bound Helpless" by Andrey Samacerv via Femdom Artists

Putting down images and emotions that she etched in my mind before the fog of subspace and the passage of time blur the specific details...

Captured... collared... wrists bound and ankles bound... blinfolded on and off... I couldn't keep up with her challenges... I couldn't bring down the number of strokes... the penguins just wouldn't stay on the iceberg... 7 strokes here... 19 strokes there... I lost track of the other numbers... she demanded I be on all-fours... sat on my back... sometimes the paddle... sometimes the cane...

My Goddess ordered me to lay down on my back on the sofa.... I struggled to get on... my breathing became more laborious as time passed while she sat on my mid-section for the duration... I was just another layer of the sofa under her... she lit a cigarette... put the ashtray on my chest... teased me with her smoke... teased my nipples with the burning tip... ordered me to open my mouth... tasted her ashes... I was her furniture and ashtray for the time it took her to smoke...

She walked away from the sofa for a minute... came back and began her to draw messages and symbols of her love for me, her dominance over me... from the top of my chest to my privates... I would remain marked and identified as her property for days to come...

The aftercare was tender... warm... close... so incredibly close to her... belonged to her... she cherished her possession, her property, her pet, her toy... so incredibly close...

Artwork courtesy of Shohei Yamashiro from Slug on Leather via Lunar Black

Reminder (E)

An Abuse of Power, by Caregan, via Lunar Black

I am loved,
owned,
& collared.

Selena

...Pink Sharpie marking my Goddess made on my chest last night... between rounds of heavy nipple play... taking advantage of the fact I was bound in wrist and ankle cuffs.

A reminder for me to see every day (until it washes off in 3-4 days) while she's away on a business trip this week...

Foot worship: Rush and excitement (E)

Artwork courtesy of Lunar Black

My Goddess looked absolutely splendid lying on the bed, up on one elbow watching some television, relaxing after a long day. She had told me to refresh her drink, and I was hobbling back to hand it to her. Yes… hobbling.

A bit earlier, when we had come back, she had placed and locked my leather collar around my neck, and she had demanded that I bring her the leather wrist cuffs and ankle cuffs, which she promptly locked on me. The hobbling part was because she clipped the wrist cuffs together and the ankle cuffs together. Oh, how she loves to watch me struggle, puttering around to serve her. And while this inevitably leaves me feeling awkward, I am always happy to entertain my Goddess. The sexiness of her smile of superiority, the mischievousness energy of her having the upper hand, and her dominant giggles, are totally intoxicating.

After preparing her drink the first time, we engaged in one of our favorite card games. We played without me knowing whether she would punish me for winning or for losing. It didn’t really matter because by the time we finished, she needed a new drink, and that’s when I returned, with short hobbling steps, and found her on the bed, irresistibly, dominantly, lying there, and enjoying the spectacle of my minor predicament.

After placing the drink on the side table, my Goddess told me that she needed a foot rub. I instantly felt a rush come over me, and butterflies in my stomach. I could not return to the bottom of the bed fast enough. I fell to my knees, and reached over for one of her feet, not far away from the edge of the bed.

I thoroughly worked over my Goddess’ feet, cupping and kneading the pad of her heels, rubbing and stroking her arches, kneading the forefoot areas, individually massaging and gently stretching her toes, and generally trying to relax every part of her feet.

By then, my Goddess was laying on both her elbows, with her head back, her beautiful hair dropping down freely. She truly looked divine. I could not help but to move in closer, and I gently started reaching for her toes with my tongue. With the first licks, I heard a deep moan come from her, and then a bit of a shiver, and I knew that I had to get a bit more intimate in worshipping her feet.

My tongue made its way under, over, around, and in-between each of her toes. Her deep guttural exhales and moans urged me to go on. Next, I took in different combinations of my Goddess’ toes into my mouth, savoring each of them like delicate, tasty morsels of fine food, and again running my tongue over them, in a half-caress, half-massage kind of way. We were both entranced...

After taking care of both feet, the look in her eyes told me something had been started that would not be stopped. I could feel my Goddess’ need, her hunger. I climbed, as gracefully as I could manage in the clipped cuffs, onto the bed, and began to kiss her beautiful and smooth legs up and down. After a few passes, I settled lower between her legs, pushed my arms under and around the back of her thighs and over to her belly, where my hands reached hers.

As busy as it had been up to now, my tongue’s duties were not over yet. Delicately, I reached in with it, alternating slow and quick movements, teasing more gently and licking more forcefully, and I did my best to quell my Goddess’ hunger. It wasn’t long before she reached a thunderous climax. I moved up and held her in my arms as the post-orgasm trembling diminished to occasional shudders.

Once she had recovered, my Goddess pushed me away a bit, pulled my T-shirt over my head, unclipped my wrist cuffs, and reached for my nipples. This is the usual sign that it is time for more traditional love making, albeit under the condition of the delicious hurt she enjoys inflicting. Through the nipple torture she had so much fun with, she dictated the pace, and eventually the intensity, of an absolutely massive orgasm that wasn’t long in coming.

Image from http://yourbootblack.tumblr.com/ via Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress

Game night (E)

Image courtesy of Herrin Domino and Piotrushka (tumblr site not active anymore)

A little quiet time presented itself to us this weekend, and my Goddess was in the mood for some trivia. But as some of you might recall from much earlier posts, playing table games in our household tends to be significantly, hmmm, interesting, than what most people have in mind when they pull out the game board and place the pieces...

My Goddess and I enjoyed a wonderfully romantic dinner out, and did a little shopping before coming back home. During that time out, I had on locking leather ankle cuffs, a little tangible reminder of my Goddess' control and ownership of me. Upon returning home, I removed my clothes, and she added the locking the leather collar and locking leather wrist cuffs, she clipped the ankle cuffs together, and finally she clipped the wrist cuffs together.

As usual in this setup, it was challenging for me to get on and off our relatively high bed, and run for errands, and my Goddess always enjoys every second of watching me struggle moving around when I'm in bondage.

I managed to find a stable position on the bed, cross-legged, and we setup the game board, pieces, and cards. In addition to the traditional challenge of the game, my Goddess' rules were that if I missed a question, I would get four strokes of the cane for each point it was worth. For the normal course of this particular game, I could be in line for 120 strokes or more if the game went badly for me.

We picked our tiles for the first round, and each ordered them in order of our preference (from hardest/least comfortable field of knowledge = 1 point, to easiest/most comfortable field of knowledge = 4 points). She was up first (of course... she's the Goddess), and correctly answered her question. Then it was my turn... and I didn't know the answer... Crap...

I awkwardly made my way to the edge of the bed, swung my legs over the edge, and leaned over until my feet reached the floor. I hobbled to the end of the bed, where I leaned onto my hands and stuck my backside out to present a nice easy target for my Goddess. That question was worth 1 point, so I got 4 strokes. Not that many to start, but she made sure they counted...

I struggled back onto the bed, and the game continued. I got the next three questions to move into the lead (saving myself 36 strokes), and on the next round, I missed the 1-point question again. Off the bed, another 4 strokes. Next question, worth 2 points. I had no idea. Off the bed, another 8 strokes. I correctly answered the next two questions to maintain my lead (and saving myself 28 strokes).

In the third round, I missed the first question once more. So again, off the bed, and another 4 strokes. I correctly answered the next two questions, allowing me to complete going around the board and win the game, saving me any more strokes. Of course, my Goddess was disappointed, and to a certain extent, so was I, although I'm not sure if she was more disappointed at coming in a close second, or at the fact that the caning was done for now. It is worth noting, however, that in the past, the end of the game has never meant that she couldn't decide that I needed more caning...

She was, in fact, in the mood to hurt me a little more, and after we finished putting the game away, I stretched out on my belly, up to my elbows, as we chatted, and then she decided to climb onto my back for some scratching, some biting, and reaching underneath with her hands for some heavy NT over the course of about 10 minutes. As usual, my moans and squirmy movements excited her immensely, as she sat on my lower back, leaned over me, and had fun hurting me.

For some, it may beg the question, why did I not let her win? Simply, she expects me to do my best. We are both very good at trivia, and she would not at all appreciate me throwing the game, either to get more strokes or for her ego. Those are games we don't play. Nor do I ever intentionally mess up in my service to her in order to get "punishment". There's something dishonest about those kinds of mind games. Disappointing her, or incurring her wrath, would be terribly shameful for me, and not in the least something I would aim to get some pleasure from. In addition, my Goddess is way too smart not to see this kind of manipulation from a mile away.

Playful moments reinforcing the D/s dynamics of our relationship... under conditions of control (bondage, special rules) dictated by her mood... and her enjoyment of her power over me by subjecting me to sensation/impact play (caning, NT) that allowed her to physically express her dominance over my body and my mind... What a wonderful way it was to wrap-up the weekend!

Image courtesy of Eagerlicker via Dishevelled Domina

Morning attack! (E)

"My arms wrap around you, pulling the hard plains of your body against my own. Lips trail down the side of your neck as I inhale your scent. Hands roam over you, a tug of your head as I pull your hair. Lips claiming your jaw, teeth biting. Nails dig into flesh. Pressing hips against you. Hungry for the man you are. For the man I know you are. Starved for the feel of your body inside of me."

"[G]ood morning, Lover "

Image and caption courtesy of Masochistic Beauty

Still in a fog from the deep sleep I was in, I feel sharp pain around my nipples, and my loins getting warm, tightening. A moan escapes me as I'm trying to get my wits about me and realize my Goddess is right next to me doing some NT... tugging on the central D-ring of my locked leather collar... raking her long, sharp nails around my privates and occasionally digging them in... grabbing hold of the eternity collar... going back to the NT...

As I'm slowly waking up to the delicious torment of the sensation play, my Goddess climbs up onto my hips and begins to grind down and gyrate against my rock-hard penis. No penetration, she just wants to feel me like this and hurt me for a while. She increases the intensity of the NT, making me squirm more under her. It excites her... it feeds her... it fuels her need to hurt me more. My Goddess dials up the intensity, the cycle keeps spiraling up in excitement and in pain. I feel the rawness of her sexual hunger, of her domination over my body. The hurt... my movement and my moans... her own movements, rubbing and grinding against me... she hurts me more...

This is one those moments frozen in time that seems to last forever while you are engaged in it. It still gives me shivers two days later as I write about it.

If I wouldn't have dipped into subspace so quickly, my Goddess might have brought me to the edge of climax. But this was all about her. It continues until that magical nexus when I don't think I can take anymore pain but I don't want her to stop for anything in the world. Somewhere in the cycle, at the nexus, my moans stop and she gets a whimper. How she loves the whimper! She lives for the whimper! And then a huge climax tears through her body. I can feel the reverberations as she slumps forward and trembles against my chest for a minute or two.

After the last of the tremors, my Goddess sits upright again, and moves up my torso until she lines up her hips over my head. I'm desperate to taste her, to bring her pleasure again, to have her assume such a dominant position over me, and to feel the tremors and reverberations of her climax against me once more.

I begin to reach in with my tongue, exploring gently, teasing, stimulating. I feel her already well on her way to another orgasm. I slow down a bit, but it doesn't make a difference. I slow down some more, and do more teasing with the tip of my tongue, but my Goddess is having none of it. She brings herself lower onto my face, and reaches down with her fingers to pinch my nostrils shut. I begin to work much more quickly, intensely, frantically. She has reached terminal velocity on her way to climax. She keeps me from breathing until she reaches orgasm, which is just a matter of seconds. As her climax literally shakes her off my face onto a sitting position on my chest, I take in a big inhale to catch up on the oxygen, and then I enjoy once again feeling the tremors of my Goddess' orgasm echoing through my body.

As my Goddess recovers, she moves off to my side, and tell me, "Entertain me!". That's our signal that she's had all the stimulation she can handle for the time being, but that she expects me to bring myself to climax in her presence. She's very close, lying along my right side, holding her torso up on her left elbow. She starts torturing my left nipple with her right hand as I begin to stroke my penis. Then she moves her head closer, and bites down on the right nipple. She begins a new pain-pleasure cycle for me with her long and sharp nails on one side, and her teeth on the other. More pain for me... more squirming and more moans and more movement for me... more excitement for her... and higher up we go in the spiral...

It really didn't take long. I don't know how long it took, but I know it couldn't have been more than a matter of just a couple of minutes. Somewhere climbing the pain-pleasure spiral, I absolutely explode and make a huge mess. Over my legs and stomach, over her leg and hip, over the bed. Wow... Just wow...

I reach for a couple of towels. We wipe down and wipe off. We kiss. We hug. We snuggle. And then we get up to get ready for work.

Good morning to you too, my Love!

I love hotels (E)

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Predicament love making (E)

Image courtesy of http://soumis.tumblr.com/ via Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress

My Goddess places the leather collar around my neck. She is sitting on the bed, and I am kneeling before her. She very deliberately clicks the lock in the back of the collar. The wrist cuffs are next. Gently but firmly, she straps them around one wrist, and then the other. She reaches for the small locks, and clicks those in place. Finally, the ankle cuffs go on, and those are locked on also.

She asks for the double-ended clips. I start standing up to fetch them, but a curt "Ah!" from my Goddess stops me in my track. I get back my knees instinctively... I should have known. The carpet is very rough on my knees while I crawl over to the toy bag on all-fours, but I still return to her as quickly as possible.

My Goddess clips the wrist cuffs together in front of me, and then the ankle cuffs. I remain on my knees as she reclines against the headboard. I reach for one of her naked feet with my bound hands, and pull it toward me. I begin kissing each of her toes gently. I do it a second time before moving to the top of her foot. She tells me that she loves feeling my "little nose" as I'm covering her foot with kisses. After a dozen kisses over her foot, I come back to the toes. I kiss each one of them, and then again in the reverse order. I go back to the top of the foot for another dozen kisses. I finish with two more passes over the toes. I move on to the other foot. I do the same pattern. She remarks upon the softness of my nose again, rubbing against her skin while I inundate her foot with kisses.

I can feel my Goddess totally in the zone. I'm also in the zone, but in a zone at the opposite end of the spectrum. She moves away from the headboard and toward me. From my kneeling position, I move my head forward as her hips move close to me. She opens her legs, and puts her feet on my shoulders. I gently begin to lap at her. She lies back completely, but on her way down, she takes hold of my hair, pulling me in just a bit deeper into her. It is barely just a few minutes before she reaches a thunderous orgasm.

Upon reaching the peak of her climax, my Goddess pushes on my head slightly so that I can no longer reach her with my tongue. She crosses her legs behind my neck, forcing my head to lie against her lower abs. I can feel the power of the tremors racking her body.

As the waves of pleasure quiet down, my Goddess uncrosses her legs and lets me go. She sits upright in the bed, grabs hold of the central D-ring of the locked leather collar, and pulls me up and toward her. I try to climb onto the bed, but it is unusually high, and with my feet bound, I need to put my hands down on the bed, and a come up with a short hop.

She keeps pulling on the collar, and I am forced to adapt and change position quickly. She lies back, bringing me over her. I almost fall on top of her. I catch myself, planting my bound hands over her head. She smiles. The clipped wrist cuffs and ankle cuffs make for a very awkward position. She knows. She still wants me inside her. She reaches for my nipples... hard. Something else is very hard. She knows that too. And she wants it inside her. I slip my cuffed hands under her neck, right above her shoulders. With the slightly improved position, I gently slide inside her as she guides my penis in. She returns to teasing and hurting my nipples. The angle is still uncomfortable, and she loves it. She hurts me more. I try to find a better fit by moving my knees a bit, and crossing my feet, still clipped together. She has no patience for my maneuvering, and digs her nails into my nipples even harder. I exhale loudly and plunge into her almost fully.

I'm still in an awkward position, and my Goddess absolutely loves it. She shows no mercy, and gives me no choice. This is how she wants me to fuck her, and she increases the torment and the torture of my nipples. Clearly, I am expected to reach climax like this, and give her what she wants. That's OK because I so want to. I so have to.

I'll take from my Goddess' reactions that the position, and what I did, worked for her, although I know my predicament was a significant part of her enjoyment. On my side, despite some less than ideal positioning, it did not take much time to reach a massive orgasm (I'm almost feeling the tremors again just wrtting about it.)

I kept shaking as I bent my elbows and pressed my chest against her, with my cuffed hands still under her neck. I uncross my cuffed feet and once more try to find a comfortable position while my heart rate and breath slow down.

A few minutes later, after some cleaning up, and my Goddess enjoying my hobbled walk to the bathroom and back, both of us are spent, and ready to crash and fall asleep. She leaves the bondage gear on me. I lie on my side, facing my Goddess. Facing away from me, she snuggles, backing into me. She reaches over to pull my arms over her as we put the final touches on our spooning position. She securely grabs the D-rings of each wrist cuff, looping her thumbs through them, ensuring that I can't move very much, and we almost immediately drift off to sleep.

Her needs on a Monday morning (E)

Bound Men I, by Mind Abuse, via Lunar Black

Pulled from a deep in sleep, I barely notice any light coming from outside. I feel tension around my neck, and pressure on my right nipple that rapidly becomes a sharp pain. My Goddess is tugging on the central D-ring of the locked leather collar, pulling me closer to her, and what begins as nipple teasing fast becomes NT.

My mind is still foggy when my Goddess pushes me on my back and mounts my hips (without penetration). She reaches for more NT, taking occasional breaks to reach back for some CBT, or forward to take a hold of one of the D-rings on the collar.

My movements and moans reacting to the pain she's causing is driving her crazy... in the best kind of way. She begins to gyrate her hips over mine. She increases the intensity of the NT. I can't help but to squirm a little more, to moan a little more. She gets more excited and grinds her hips harder and hurts me more. The cycle rapidly spirals out of control. She slumps over my chest. She grabs once more the central D-ring of the collar, and keeps hold of one nipple, which she hurts until a whimper escapes from me. A huge climax rips through her body, which feels amazing to me, lying beneath her. I feel her heart beat against my chest, her breathing fast and heavy against my body.

In a matter of a few minutes, like a tiger pouncing and devoring a prey to satisfy its hunger, my Goddess woke me up and hurt me until she reached climax.

She moves off me, and sits back against the head of the bed, looking down at me smug, dominant, smiling. But I can tell she's still hungry. I can almost tangibly feel the waves of her dominance and her sexual energy. I move over her legs, and bring my head down between her legs. Instantly she reacts to my tongue. She grabs my hair and pulls me in. The build-up is quick and incredibly intense. Again, in a matter of just a few minutes, she once more reaches a huge climax, shaking for over a minute after she pushed my head away from her.

Once she recovers, we hug, she gets off the bed and heads for the shower. That was it. This morning was all about her. And I was thoroughly delighted in this unexpected start to the week, despite the unequal score in orgasms (2-0).

Haunting smoking fetish moments & flashbacks (E)

Image from Smoking Femme Fatale

I'm sitting on the floor, holding the ashtray for my Goddess. I lit her cigarette and gave it to her. I'll be holding the ashtray for her until she's done. She's looking down on her pet with affection, but also with a sense of control... power... ownership... For all the mystique of a beautiful woman who makes smoking sexy, who makes you weak in the knees while she does it, there nothing quite like being in a position to look up at her while she is doing it...

* * * * *

My Goddess reaches over and pulls me in close to her by the chain she keeps locked around my neck at all times. She reaches up to me, like she's going to kiss me. She locks lips with me. She makes sure our lips are tightly sealed. She exhales the smoke of her cigarette. I can feel her dominance rise like the phoenix over the horizon. She's in a mood. I will be subject to much more later on.

* * * * *

The nipple rings were really, REALLY hurting. I'm pretty good with NT, including a variety of nipple clamps, pins, and clips, but these pressure rings were really tight. I didn't know if I could go 10 minutes with them. My Goddess got 15 out of me. Then she knew by my reactions they had to come off. She asked me if I wanted them off. Unusual for me, I said yes. At that point, she said she would take them off... after her next cigarette. The mix of the subspace, the pain, the control, and her smoking was totally overwhelming. And I wasn't sure anymore I wanted her to finish quickly...

* * * * *

I'm in bondage on the bed, immobile. Feet cuffed and locked into a stretcher at the foot of the bed. Wrists and cuffed and locked and tied to headboard of the bed. Sight taken away by a blindfold. Other senses heightened by the bondage and the loss of seeing what is going on. My Goddess sits next to me, and blows smoke in my face. It is but the first part of what may come. Forced inhales? Heat play? Nipple torture? Forced smoking? Often it is all of them.

* * * * *

My Goddess returns to check in on me. I've been hanging in the closet during the time she was in the shower. Blindfolded, on my knees, with my wrists cuffed and locked to the high rack above my head. After even just a few minutes in isolated bondage, I can feel the warmth of her body and the aura of her dominance as she opens the door. She runs her nails over my skin, pulls on my hair, lifts my chin up to give me a kiss. She lights a cigarette. Teases me with it. Again, I don't know quite what she'll be in the mood for... could be forced inhales... heat play... nipple torture... forced smoking... it all depends on how much time she has before she leaves for work

* * * * *

We spend the evening over a board game... in the only way my Goddess will allow it... with me in bondage. She loves to see me naked for hours with my wrists bound together, and with my ankles bound together. She loves to see me struggling to throw a dice, place a tile, or pick-up a card. She loves to watch me while I hobble along slowly to get her a drink or get her a snack during the time of the game. She especially loves to watch me fumble to reach for the cigarettes, and light them when she says it's time. Later on, the game ends, she stands, and I move to all fours to prepare to stand up. She stops me. I sit back on my ankles. She stands over me. She pulls on my hair, snapping my head back. She's still holding her cigarette, and the ash is lenghtening. Will she or won't she...

Image courtesy of Code 831

The right stuff... at the wrong time (E)

Artwork courtesy of Men in Pain, via Dishevelled Domina

I pulled down the laptop to the floor to show my Goddess something. I laid down in front of the computer, on my belly and elbows, and expected her to lie down next to me, in the same position, to look at what I wanted to show her.

She came over, unexpectedly sat on my lower back, laid down her torso along my back, extended her legs over mine, and looked over my shoulder on one side. Her hands went down to my sides. Her weight pinned me down, leaving me unable to move, vulnerable, one of our favorite positions for play.

I wanted to close my eyes. I wanted her to reach over with her hands, her fingers, her nails, and reach under my shirt, to the front, to tease, torment, and torture my nipples. I wanted her to sit back upright while she was doing NT and start grinding her hips against my lower back as she began to get excited by my moans, my squirming, my trying to escape her without really wanting to be successful. I wanted her to hurt me until she climaxed. I wanted her to...

STOP! REWIND!

We were spending a quiet evening with family, and some were present in the living room when I had something interesting to show my Goddess. I was very taken aback when she positioned herself over me. I really thought she'd come right next to me on the floor. Of course, she could not engage in the course of action that naturally ensues when she takes up the position that she did.

Of course, I did not close my eyes, nor did she do any NT, and no, she did not reach climax.

Just an exceedingly affectionate moment in the eyes of those who don't know.

Twenty-four hours later, I'm still having flashbacks to what wasn't. Today was too busy for us, we came back too late, and we were too tired, to follow up on this. Just the usual daily rituals and D/s dynamics for today. And so the hunger grows more consuming...

Now that was torture... and not of the hot, subspacey, D/s kind.

Sexy interlude: view from the bottom (E)

Artwork courtesy of Thou Shall Love Thy Mistress

Little did I know my Goddess was planning to write about our "Sexy Interlude" from a few evenings ago. This entry will give you the opportunity to contrast the same interlude from her dominant perspective and from mine.

I thought I was just returning to the bedroom to go to sleep. But my Goddess was in matching bra and panties, lying on her stomach, watching something on her computer. And she looked stunningly sexy.

On my way to getting next to her to see what she was watching, I grabbed the locking leather collar from the dresser so that I could offer it to her, as is our nightly ritual. She took the collar, placed it around my neck, locked it, and grabbed the front D-ring to pull me closer for a kiss.

We kept on kissing passionately for a minute or two. She smelled so good... her lips were so soft... her body was so warm... and having her next to me felt so good.

Bringing our kissing to a gentle stop, my Goddess softly but firmly told me to get her a blindfold. I went into our toy bag, and brought a leather blindfold back to her quickly. She put it on me, she told me to lie back, and she positioned me exactly as she wanted.

My Goddess got up, and took a few steps away from the bed. I heard her rummage through some stuff, and shortly after I felt the cool softness of rope going around my lower legs. She looped the rope about half-a-dozen times, and bound my ankles in a column tie. I then felt some tension on my legs as she tied the ends of the rope to something heavy past the foot of the bed, likely the dresser standing against the opposing wall.

As soon as my legs were secured, I felt my Goddess move up to tie my wrists with a very soft fabric, and place my hands over my head in a firm enough manner that I knew I was not to move them until such a time she told me I could.

Finally, she sat on top of my hips, and began to rub herself against me, and gyrate, in a most suggestive manner, getting me very excited and erect. She also began teasing and hurting my nipples, and as I was reacting to her NT, she became even more turned on herself. In no time at all, she lifted her hips, grabbed my member firmly, and lowered herself on it, and on me, and resumed her movements. Bound and very limited in movements, I could only lay back and enjoy the ride as my Goddess used me as she wanted, satisfying simultaneously her sexual urges and her need to hurt me.

Her first orgasm came quickly. Her post-orgasm trembling sent a powerful shudder through my body, but that was all I was going to get for now. She moved off me for a few moments and focused more on some sadistic teasing, running her nails deeply over my chest and my sides.

Rapidly my moans and my gentle squirming got her excited again, and she mounted me a second time. The NT was more intense this time, and as I moved more forcefully against the bondage, she came to a huge climax a second time, just barely taking more time than for the first one.

My Goddess leaned and rested over me. I could feel her chest heaving against mine, her breathing heavy and quick, and her heart racing. I can't express how satisfying it is to bring pleasure to my Goddess, even in a small way.

Once she recovered somewhat, my Goddess laid on the side next to me. One hand supporting her head, her body alongside mine, she began on CBT with her left hand, and moved back and forth between the CBT and some NT for a minute of two. She explained to me that she expected me to provide myself with an orgasm for her own enjoyment. And then she released my wrists from bondage.

This was a new position for me. On my back, legs tied tight, blindfolded, I hesitated for a moment. She said in a deliciously dominant voice, "You wouldn't want to disappoint me, would you?"

I began to touch myself as my Goddess returned more vigorously to torturing my nipples with her left hand, one side at a time. Each 30 seconds or so she would focus her efforts on one of the nipples, and then return to the other. After a few minutes of this, she dug her nails, and twisted and tortured the left nipple, and she brought her head close to my chest to begin biting the right one. Moans became whimpers, which excite her to no end. She squeezed harder on the left, bit down harder on the right, and with a loud whimper coming from deep inside, I absolutely exploded, uncontrollably shooting cum all over my stomach and her right hip and upper thigh.

The climax felt like it would never end. I couldn't help but to continue moving my left hand up and down until the intense waves of pleasures faded completely, and my Goddess had released my nipples from her delightful torment.

Totally spent, I just laid there, catching my breath, as I felt my Goddess leaning over my side, positively radiating in satisfaction and dominance, proud of her improvised little interlude that was such powerful release for both of us.